♥ Wednesday, December 29, 2010 ♥
And I just realized that when you left, you took my happiness together with you. I fake a smile every time I'm with my friends, every time I went out from my lovely house. I just don't seem to feel happy for almost everything, even for the things that I love to do. Well maybe my Gf's right. "sometimes, the girls that seem the happiest are the one's breaking down inside." True enough.?
I've been hurt thousands of times by you and right now, my heart is extremely numb. I can't feel anything now. I'm truly hurt. I don't know how you'd feel about it, but i guess if you're in my shoes, you'll definitely feel me. I pick myself up every time I fall. I wipe my own tears every time I cry. I lend myself my own shoulders to cry on. I did my part as a girlfriend and I did your part too as a boyfriend. I did almost everything that it hurts so bad to know that I've been the only one who worked so hard to keep this relationship.
I've been hurt thousands of times by you and right now, my heart is extremely numb. I can't feel anything now. I'm truly hurt. I don't know how you'd feel about it, but i guess if you're in my shoes, you'll definitely feel me. I pick myself up every time I fall. I wipe my own tears every time I cry. I lend myself my own shoulders to cry on. I did my part as a girlfriend and I did your part too as a boyfriend. I did almost everything that it hurts so bad to know that I've been the only one who worked so hard to keep this relationship.
I'm just so afraid that when you come back one day, I don't need you anymore. Because I'm used to how things work when you're not there. Time heals almost everything that I'm so afraid that you're too little too late. Let's pray hard that things will be the same when you come back. :')
Just know that until now, no matter what happens, my love for you will remain the same. It won't change even for a bit. So at the very least, be proud that you got a girl that's strong, so strong like me to even hold on to everything even without your presence. And I'm very proud of myself too that I can wait for you this long because honestly, I never thought that I can do this.
Dear God, since 2011 is only a few days away, I really hope that it's gonna be heaven better than this year please. Too many heartbreaking ordeals you've given me this year, so I hope that next year's ordeals won't bring too much pain to me. Cause I can't, I just can't go through another major heartbreak please. I'm getting weaker as days go by, for all my strength have been washed away. Please, lessen this heartache that I've been handling. :'( Thats all I'm asking from you God, thankyou for hearing me out.
